We all carry stories about who we are. Some of them are loud, for example, “I’m strong,” “I’m independent,” “I’m not good with relationships.” Others live quietly beneath the surface, shaping our decisions without ever being questioned.

These stories are not random. They are formed through experience—especially early experience—and stored in the subconscious mind. Over time, they become the lens through which we see ourselves, as well as others, and the world in general.

What is important to keep in mind, though, is that the subconscious does not distinguish between external reality and internal experience. If a belief has been repeated enough through a visualization or an internal dialogue, it begins to feel like a fact. This is how someone can be intelligent and successful, and yet believe they’re not good enough. It is how someone can be loved and still feel unworthy of love. This is how thought and behavior patterns repeat and reinforce themselves, even when, at a conscious level, we crave something different.

The subconscious is not trying to sabotage you. It is trying to protect you by adhering to the thought patterns that it believes to be safe and true. If you believe that the world is a dangerous place, the subconscious will keep you avoiding human contact and connections. That’s why change can feel difficult. Because when the conscious mind decides to adjust a behavior, the subconscious sees it as a challenge to the established identity, which it has sworn to protect.

A healing journey can begin when you become aware of the stories within which you live. Awareness is always the first step, and it is not used to judge the beliefs and behaviors, but to question them: Where did this belief come from? Is it absolutely true? Who would I be without it? When you begin to gently loosen your grip on these narratives, something shifts. You create space. And in that space, new possibilities can emerge. This is where deeper work can take place. Combining talk therapy, which changes the narrative at the conscious level, with hypnosis, which changes the narrative at the subconscious level, can be a powerful way to change the lens through which you experience reality. By accessing the subconscious directly, that is experientially and not just intellectually, you can begin to rewrite the internal script.

What is a story that you want to experience? How do you want to see yourself? How do you want to see the world around you? What kinds of people do you want to have around you? What is the reality you want to live? Choose the story and then begin to tell it. And as the story changes, so will your reality.

By Natalie Candela, PhD

Certified Hypnotherapist and Transformation Coach

Awakened Hypnosis (https://awakenedhypnosis.com)